It's not all rose colored glasses
In my young adult years, I overlooked or excused abusive behaviors and patterns because I am an optimist. I look for the silver lining - and that made me tolerate a relationship that was toxic for too many years. In other relationships, my self esteem was so low, I had trouble believing in genuinely healthy behaviors. I was effectively “colorblind” to the hazards and safeties of my environment.
With distance and healing and practice, I am now able to see the difference between those who harm and those who help. I have also learned that I am not responsible for someone’s toxicity any more than I am responsible for another’s thoughtfulness. Others are who they are - may we learn to see them that way.

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