Why We're Done with Christmas Part 1

When we decided we were done with Christmas (and Easter, but that's another post), we knew we'd have a lot of questions to answer from friends and family.  YES, we love Jesus and celebrate His birth.  We also feel convicted to obey the Bible and not honor Him with things that are against Him.  It's hard to see my heart when you're only reading words, but I hope if you've read other posts, you'll know me well enough to see my heart as I share hard things.

Reason #1 Why we're done with Christmas...

Some of what I'll share here may be hard for some people to read. I'll keep reminding you to remember to hear my heart and to keep yours open to the Holy Spirit. I'll start with something easy (and pretty obvious).

Although it's not the only holiday to be so, Christmas is probably the most commercialized event during the entire year. Decorations start going up before Halloween. We celebrate everything we're thankful for the day before immediately going out and trying to hoard more stuff we don't need.

Black Friday kicks it all off because that's when many retailers go back "into the black" if they haven't had a very profitable year. But by doing so, millions of Americans go further into debt. Excuses are made that so much money was saved on a sale that no one seems to care that hundreds (or thousands) of dollars were still spent! Families who struggle throughout the year to pay regular bills suddenly feel the need to buy new TVs simply because they're marked down. But we miss the point that we're buying into the advertising ploy.
Then we have all of the expectations: we can't let our children be disappointed so we buy more than we should; company parties and gift exchanges add expenses; our child can't be the only one who doesn't have something for *every* teacher; last minute gifts for anyone who drops by....The expectations placed upon us are ridiculous! But again, the pressure to participate is overwhelming. And the subliminal signals to keep "giving" keep coming at us.

And while all this is being done in the name of "giving," it's also done with such a horrible attitude to everyone we come across. We're under so much financial and emotional stress that we take it out on everyone. The weary cashier who can't move fast enough, the person who got the last item that we wanted, the elderly lady who took the prime parking place. But let's put that quarter in the Salvation Army pot so we can feel good about ourselves! And let's not forget to get defensive to anyone who will listen that it is NOT "Happy Holidays," but "Merry Christmas." As if the words and the presents matter more than the attitude in our hearts.

The enemy's tactic is to take the focus off of anything that is holy and put it squarely on ourselves. And that is what commercialism has done. We are so concerned with keeping up appearances that we go into debt to be the cool parent instead of teaching our kids about gratitude and contentment. We worry about what others will think if we don't have as many decorations, the biggest tree, the newest, shiniest things to brag about. We become wrapped up in making ourselves look good and the pride of pleasing others rather than attempting to keep the focus on the cliche "reason for the season."

The bible offers advice against the trappings of commercialism. Jesus said, "Watch out! Be on guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions." (Luke 12:15) Paul said that as humanity continues, our hearts would become more cold toward godly things and focus more on the flesh that on the Father. "People will be lovers of themselves...lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God." (2 Timothy 3:2,4).

My first reason for no longer suffering under this Christmas season is because I will not be forced to participate in the retail scheme of incurring debt under the guise of "Jesus." Christians need to take authority over their lives in the areas of debt and possessions and showing their children that having more is not the same as having what is necessary.

"But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that." (1 Timothy 6:8)

Reason #2 Why we're done with Christmas...

Please remember I am sharing all of this because I feel a burden on my heart to do so. I'm asking you to turn the box and look at it from a different perspective. It by no means is meant to hurt anyone. But I feel very strongly that it's important. These things need to be discussed. These things need to be brought out into the light and considered. So please stick with me and let me encourage you, even as I may make you uncomfortable.

Santa Clause. The second reason Christmas bothers me so much is the fat man in the red suit. Yes, I know there was a good man named Kris Kringle, Saint Nick, toys to the poor, etc. But he isn't who we honor this time of year.

The popular image of the Santa we know today was the creation of an artist who created an image for a coca cola ad in 1931. Before then, many images of Santa existed, but this one was well received and has remained through the decades. In true commercialized fashion, he grew to become larger than life, taking over a massive part of the Christmas season we now know.

So what's my issue? I have several. The first is that he gets credit for EVERYTHING. I feel bad for the parents who scrap and scrimp to save enough money to get the one thing their child wants - only to put "From Santa" on the tag. The child who sees his family struggling on a daily basis doesn't understand the awesome sacrifice it took for his parents to provide that gift. An opportunity for great gratitude is lost.

And then there's the fact that Santa is not an equal opportunity giver. Some kids get the really expensive gifts from Santa - "It's just what I wanted!" Other kids get the knock off brand of what they asked for and they don't know why. "Billy asked Santa for a hover board and got one, why didn't Santa bring me one too?" Yeah, explain that. Why does Santa love some kids more?

But my biggest issue with Santa is the lying. I'm sorry, really I am, I know it's supposed to be "magical and harmless and fun and in the spirit of Christmas." Except it's not. I have watched children be devastated when they finally realize Santa isn't real. I have heard them ask their parents, "so you lied to me?" These same parents who told their children they would *never* lie to them - and better yet, expect their kids not to lie to them in return.

And the lies just build upon each other. Why is that Santa in the store when we just saw him on the street corner? Why does he need helpers if he has elves? How does one man get around the world in one night? In the "spirit and magic of Christmas," we LIE and call it fun - the total opposite of behavior we are to have as Christians.

And the fear tactics! "Santa is watching you! You better be good!" And now we have the Elf on the Shelf to keep kids in line. Because it's an imaginary man who should prompt our kids to choose to do the right thing? We've turned over our parental responsibilities to a character who only comes around once a year?

And that brings me to the crux of the problem: Who sees us when we're sleeping and knows when we're awake? Who also knows every hair on our heads? Who knows when we've been bad or good - and knows every sin in our hearts? Who wants us to be good for HIS sake? Who says, "You better watch out" because there is an enemy that wants to take our minds off of our Lord? Who's impending arrival are we to await with anticipation?!? Songs are sung about an imaginary man that fits the description of the One True God - and we join in. A holiday sold to us as the birthday of our Savior and we make Him share the celebration with a storybook character with Jesus' own attributes.

When my girls were still very young, I was living off very little. I had less than $500 a month, I was in low income housing, and I was on food stamps. I was a single, disabled mom who just wanted to take care of her children as best I could. A dear, sweet friend and neighbor bought my daughters several small gifts to put under the tree I had been given. Sandy didn't want me to tell the girls who the gifts were from and told me to tell them they were "From Santa." I smiled and said, "I cant' do that. I will not give the credit of your blessing to an imaginary man. But I *will* tell my girls the gifts are 'From Jesus.' Because He's using you to bless us."

I have failed at parenting. I have failed at being a Christian. I will again and again and again, despite not wanting to. But misleading my children, planting in them the idea that not everything I say to them is true, was never a part of my parenting that I had to struggle with. I never wanted my girls to say to me, "If Santa isn't real, and the Easter Bunny isn't real, and the Tooth Fairy isn't real, God must not be real either." There is one thing that is most important above all other things - the eternal life we can spend with our Lord Jesus. Anything I do that interferes with or hampers the progress of my children coming to Jesus is not only detrimental, it can have eternal consequences.

If I've stepped on any toes, I'm sorry for the hurt. But I implore you to pray about these things. I know we get defensive about the things that we don't agree with. I do it all the time! But we are also to be teachable. We are to be open to the Holy Spirit when He brings us a new light in which to view a subject. This is not an easy conversation to have, but I hope you're willing to have it with the only One that matters.

Reason #3 Why we’re done with Christmas…

Would it surprise you to know that traditionally, Jews do not spend a lot of time commemorating births? In Ecclesiastes 7:1, King Solomon said, “The day of death is better than the day of birth.” “The Encyclopedia Judaica could not be more blunt: ‘The celebration of birthdays is unknown in traditional Jewish ritual.’ When a person is born, it is not known what he will be like when grown and what his deeds will be – whether righteous or wicked, good, or evil. When he dies, however, if he departs with a good name and leaves the world in peace, people should rejoice.” (http://ritualwell.org/ritual/birthdays-jewishly) Isn’t that interesting?
That helps explain why scripture gives many more details about the time of Christ’s death (Passover, which is widely accepted as being April 3, 33AD) and no information about the date of His birth. With our technology, scientists and evangelicals have been able to go backwards with the scriptural clues and deduct that Christ was more likely born in the fall, specifically around the Feast of Tabernacles/Sukkot which occurs in either September or October (depending on the lunar calendar). “John 1:14 tells us that the Word became flesh and ‘dwelt’ among us.” In Hebrew, the word “dwelt” can be translated “tabernacled.” If you’ve done any studies on the feasts, you know that God works mighty things on His feast days. It would make perfect sense that Christ was both born and died on feast days. (And if it’s correct, he was born on the last feast day and died on the first feast day! Fascinating, isn’t it?!)

So we have a Savior born in the fall. But His birth is celebrated in December.

I have a problem with this.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine on social media had another friend send her “Happy Birthday” wishes. My friend said, “Thank you, but my birthday was in September.” This is what we’re doing with Jesus! “Yes, Lord, I want to celebrate the wonderful gift of Your birth, but I don’t really care about when You were born. I only care about the date on the calendar that was decided long ago would be Your birthday.”

How many of us would be perfectly alright if our birthday arrived and every single family member and friend ignored it? No gifts, no cake, no special wishes. No song, no extra love, no acknowledgement at all. And then, almost three months later – “HAPPY BIRTHDAY! We love you! We want to celebrate you!” But wait, it was three months ago. “Oh, we don’t care when it really was, we want to celebrate NOW because that’s what everyone else wants to do.” Soooo, it’s about what everyone else wants….it has nothing to do with you.

But the absurdity doesn’t stop there. Instead of celebrating your birthday – like they say they are – each person has provided everyone else a list of things they’d like to be given and now they are all exchanging gifts with one another! And what do you get? “Oh, *you’re* the REASON for this celebration! So thank you!” Soooo, again, it’s all about everyone else, and it has nothing to do with you.

Does anyone else see how backwards this is?

There are many, many clichés and mantras surrounding the explanations for this behavior:

*“We give presents to represent the gifts brought to Jesus by the wise men.” Except the wise men didn’t show up at Christ’s birth. They showed up 18-24 months later.

*“Christmas presents bring us Christ’s presence.” Except they don’t – they take our focus off of Christ and keep it squarely on our own wants and desires.

*“Jesus is the reason for the season.” Except He wasn’t born in this season. He is “celebrated” months later, by giving other people the things that they want, and He is then praised for providing the opportunity to focus on ourselves!

Christmas has evolved into what we see today – chaos and consumerism. And I know that there are many of you reading this who will say that you *do* focus on the real reason of the holiday. So this is where I challenge you: I think it is vital that we remember the birth of our Lord. We need to meditate on the greatest gift ever given to mankind. But we need to do it at the correct time of the year. And we need to do it in such a way that it honors Him, and not ourselves. To do that, it is necessary to look to the Feast of Tabernacles. There is much more to this feast day (and much more to come with Christ’s return!); but in terms of remembering the birth of our Savior, it is a beautiful feast of Emmanuel, “God with us,” coming to a virgin, laid in a manger, worshipped by shepherds, tabnernacling/dwelling with His creation. It was holy and quiet and unpretentious. It was the total opposite of this Christmas season that is thrust upon us.

If you are truly wanting to honor Jesus during this season, I hope you are beginning to see that there IS a way to honor Him correctly. And don’t give up on me yet. I know I’m offering a lot of information, but there is something special still to come. Stick with me! I promise it’s worth it!

(This article is EXCELLENT. I hope you’ll read it. http://hethathasanear.com/Birth.html)

Reason #4 Why we’re done with Christmas

Did you know that the Puritans, the first to settle in this New World, the colonists of 1620, banned and made illegal the celebration of Christmas? It’s true!

Besides believing that scripture was very clear that Jesus was born in September (hmmm…interesting that even the Puritans were aware of that!), they had left an England that promoted chaos at Christmas.

There was a tradition of spending the twelve days of Christmas eating, drinking, and being merry in excess. Among this excess, was “the concept of 'misrule', or a ritualized reversal of traditional social norms, [which] was an important element of Christmas. It was precisely this face of Christmas, however, that the Puritans of sixteenth- and seventeenth-century England found so objectionable. In the 1580s, Philip Stubbes, the author of The Anatomie of Abuses, complained ‘That more mischief is that time committed than in all the year besides, what masking and mumming, whereby robbery whoredom, murder and what not is committed? What dicing and carding, what eating and drinking, what banqueting and feasting is then used, more than in all the year besides, to the great dishonour of God and impoverishing of the realm.’”

"Men dishonor Christ more in the 12 days of Christmas," wrote the 16th-century clergyman Hugh Latimer, "than in all the 12 months besides."

Many among England began to reflect that perhaps the tradition of exorbitant sins during the yuletide season should be done away with. Speakers came forward, chastising the public, “With the more solemn humiliation because it may call to remembrance our sins, and the sins of our forefathers who have turned this Feast, pretending the memory of Christ, into an extreme forgetfulness of him, by giving liberty to carnal and sensual delights...” But it was to no avail.

“Dismissing all alternative datings of Christ's nativity [despite evidence to the contrary], Edward Fisher, a Royalist clergyman, asserted that 'the 25th day of December is the just, true and exact day of our Saviour's birth', and concluded with an exhortation to his readers to: Stand fast and hold the traditions which we have been taught, let us make them known to our children that the generations to come may know them.’”

Even as our nation was in its early years of birth, December 25th was still considered a normal work day. It wasn’t until the publishing of the poem “’Twas the Night Before Christmas” that states began to introduce Christmas festivities among their normal December month. The state of Alabama was the first to declare Christmas a public holiday in 1836. However, even as other states in the south followed suit, Northern and New England states continued to treat December 25th as any regular day as late as 1850. It was a full 250 years from the time the Puritans arrived until President Ulysses S. Grant deemed Christmas a federal holiday in 1870.

The banned Christmas of the Puritans was one of greed, excessive debauchery, and man-made traditions that ignored any association of Christ. I find it interesting that it appears to bear such a close resemblance to the Christmas of today. The colonists left England and the monarchy to escape persecution of religion and seek to live free under republic rule. And yet so many of the things those first Americans sought to leave behind them have crept up and made themselves at home in society today.

If those same people recognized the need to leave England and start fresh without the traditions and expectations of their previous country, I have to believe they also knew what they were doing when they made Christmas illegal in their new land.

(Quotes from http://www.historytoday.com/chris-dur…/puritan-war-christmas and http://theweek.com/articl…/…/when-americans-banned-christmas)

If you're still reading and still interested, click here for Part 2 of Why We're Done with Christmas.

Why We're Done with Christmas Part 2

Reason #5 Why we’re done with Christmas

I decided to split this post into two different blog posts (Part 1 here) because this is where everything takes a turn in the information I’m sharing. My previous thoughts have been based mostly on information that support my personal opinion. Today focuses on the facts of the origins of Christmas. So I have spent extra time praying and gathering my thoughts. It is my intention to convey the Truth of the matter while also being kind to the reader. This is not an easy thing to say, and it’s most certainly not an easy thing to hear. I know there will be disagreements with me. I ask you to remember that I am not writing these things because it matters to *me* where you stand on the issue. It matters to God where you stand on the issue. And there is no gray area.

It may come as no surprise to you that my fifth reason that we are done with Christmas is that it is tied to centuries of paganism. What may surprise you is the depths of those pagan roots.

Christmas as the observance of the Savior’s birth did not come into existence immediately. It was not observed for at least three centuries after His birth. But Christmas as a pagan holiday traces back thousands of years to a man named King Nimrod, founder of ancient pagan Babylon. “Nimrod began a counterfeit religion in the Book of Genesis that was to compete with the True Faith of the Bible in every conceivable way down through the centuries. The Bible refers to it as the religion of Mystery Babylon — the mother of false religion that will be destroyed when the Savior [Yeshua] comes to set up His throne on earth.” The story of Nimrod is lengthy and can be found here. What should be made note of is that Nimrod’s son, Tammuz, is considered by pagans to be Nimrod reincarnated. And in Ezekiel 8:14-18, the scriptures condemn any celebration or worship of Tammuz.

Historically, there was (and is) a winter celebration that revolved around the solstice. In those days, Mithras (also known as Baal to the Babylonians and Amon-Ra to the Egyptians), the pagan sun god, was renown. Joscelyn Godwin, professor at Colgate University, writes that Mithras was “the creator and orderer of the universe, hence a manifestation of the creative Logos or Word. Seeing mankind afflicted by Ahriman, the cosmic power of darkness, he incarnated on earth. His birth on 25 December was witnessed by shepherds. After many deeds he held a last supper with his disciples and returned to heaven. At the end of the world he will come again to judge resurrected mankind and after the last battle, victorious over evil, he will lead the chosen ones through a river of fire to a blessed immortality.” Godwin remarks, “No wonder the early Christians were disturbed by a deity who bore so close a resemblance to their own, and no wonder they considered him a mockery of [the Messiah].” If you didn't pay attention, you'd think that was a description of Jesus until you get to the "river of fire" part.  Scary!

In a society where both pagans and Christians fought to honor their respective savior, the Roman government offered a compromise, hoping to appease both sides. What was given as the final decree was an official calendar day of pagan traditions and gods that so closely resembled the Christian Jesus Christ that they tacked on the incorrect date of His birthday so that everyone could celebrate at the same time.

However, this caused some confusion. A mass is a celebration of the Eucharist or the emblems of the death of the Savior. Yet, “Christ-mass” is an observance supposedly in honor of Christ’s birth. Why? “The answer is found with the secular ancients. Mithras was known as the Sun Deity. His birthday, Natalis solis invicti, means ‘birthday of the invincible sun.’ It came on December 25, at the time of the winter solstice when the sun began its journey northward again. Pagan peoples were overly concerned with life and fertility. They saw life fading in the darkness of winter and so held festivals in honor of and to beckon back the sun to give life and light to the earth once more. A funeral mass came to be celebrated as the supposed birthday of the Savior.”  So going to mass serves the duel purpose of commemorating the Son/God's death while also celebrating a pagan sun god's birth?!?  How devastatingly ironic.

God-fearing Christians have always spoken up about the pagan roots of Christmas and the need to stop participating in their traditions. During his reign, Pope Leo I (440-461) chastised Christians for celebrating the birth of the sun deity on Christmas. The very Catholic church that helped create the holiday began speaking out against it! But Christians liked their celebrations.

This link is a very informative, very thought-provoking lesson on the history of pagan Christmas. It is two hours long, but so very worth it. However, if you will not watch it for yourself, here are some bullet points:

*Christmas is sun god worship, not Son God worship

*Catholic ‘halos’ behind saints are in fact sun discs for sun worship.

*This sun disc is then represented as the star on top of the Christmas tree. This tree star use predates the story of the star of Bethlehem that is commonly told today by over 1000 years.

*Our corporate worship is on Sunday because ancient Romans were already worshiping the sun god on his day of the week – SUNday. They worshiped the sun god on his birthday, December 25th. We live by the Roman calendar today.

*Constantine was responsible for combining the pagan sun worship holiday and commemorating Christ’s birthday on December 25th.

*The Norse god, Odin, is the origin of Santa Claus. He was the god of “wisdom, magic, and occult knowledge.” His name means “the inspired one.”

*Odin traveled around the world on a horse that had 8 legs. This is where the 8 reindeer came from (Rudolph was added later!).  Here's a short video of the explanation.

*Santa’s elves were originally the Krampus, a dark helper who would travel with Klaus and beat any naughty children. They worked in contrast to St. Nick/Santa Claus who brought toys and gifts to good children.

*People still dress up as these Krampuses today during St. Nick and Christmas festival times in Austria, Hungary, Germany, Italy, etc. They are very scary looking beings and are often referred to as “demons.” Here's a video so you can see just what these things look like.  Warning:  don't open it in the presence of your children!

*By the 1500s in Holland, Odin became Sinterklaas; a kind and wise old man with a white beard, white dress, red cloak, crosier, and riding the skies and roofs of the houses on his white (8 legged) horse, accompanied by his Krampuses, leaving gifts for people under his sacred tree, the fir tree. He would visit on his own birthday, December 25th, and bring you gifts if you’d been good and his Krampus would beat you if you’d been bad.

*Why does Santa say “ho ho ho?” In The History of a Hobgoblin, author Allen W. Wright reveals, “Robin itself was a medieval nickname for the devil” and “Robin’s trademark laugh is ‘ho ho ho.’”

*In the 1970s, the Second Vatican Council formally stated that no Roman Catholic bishop by the name of Nicholas ever existed. There has never been a Saint Nick! Furthermore, Vatican II confessed that the legends attributed to this “saint” had no Christian origin, and probably came from pagan traditions! They essentially admitted that St Nick came from Odin who had been “Christianized.”

*The belief that Santa enters the house through the chimney developed from an old Norse legend. The Norse believed that the goddess Hertha (hearth??) appeared in the fireplace and brought good luck to the home.

*Druid homeowners would leave a treat of milk and pastries to appease the god that came down into their chimney into their fireplace.

*And here's an explanation of the tree used for pagan worship.

There is nothing wrong with traditions. We have many traditions in our lives that bring joy and happiness. It is when those traditions take precedence over scripture that we have a problem. We cannot both adhere to the traditions of man that are connected to paganism and say that we are also following the commandments of God. Many Christians will say, “That’s not what it means to *me.* That’s not what *I’m* celebrating.” Except that it is. There is evidence that Christmas is NOT Jesus’ birthday. There is evidence that Christmas IS pagan. So to say that your participation is about God and not about pagans is impossible.

But here’s one more thing: Modern day pagans and atheists mock Christians for participating in Christmas. Of all the people in the world, they KNOW the history of Christmas, and it’s not at all related to Jesus. And they laugh and ridicule us believers because we participate in the same sun and Odin worship that they are participating in. We can say that we’re singing songs to our King. We can put out our Nativity scene. We can read our scriptures about Christ’s birth. But none of that changes the facts of December 25th as the birthday of the pagan sun god.

I read a statement by Alfred Carl Hottes from 1954. He said, “If the children of Israel couldn’t use a golden calf to honor the Father, what makes us think we can use the Mithraic custom of decorating an evergreen to honor His Son?” We cannot pick and choose what we say something means. History shows us what this holiday means. It is within our ability to research and see where each part of the Christmas tradition came from.

Pagan quote: “As a pagan, I laugh every time Christians whine about their ‘Christmas traditions’ being altered and abused. You guys took our traditions and don’t even have any unique ones.”

Pagan quote: “Pagans are the reason for the season.”

Reason #6 Why we’re done with Christmas

I want to thank everyone who has made it this far with me! While I welcome everyone to read and comment, I really have been speaking to my brothers and sisters in Christ. I hope I’ve made that clear and that you’ve read all the previous posts, even if you haven’t commented. I know the last post was the hardest to read. I intentionally started with the other stuff so I could create a foundation: not only so that my reasons built upon each other, but so you would see my heart and understand my compassion. I pray that has come across. I am in no way trying to have a “judgmental spirit.” I have had a tree and stockings and know all the songs. So I’m not coming from a position that says I’m better than you are. But I feel that when you have information about something that can help someone else, you are obligated to share that information. And as a Christian, when I have information about a topic that is *hurting* another Christian’s walk with the Lord, it’s also my responsibility to share that information. In this case, this information meets both of those.

So that being said, I have one more reason of “bad news” about Christmas. And as hard as the last post was to write, this one is harder. Not because the information is worse, but because it leaves no room for excuses. If you’re willing to stick with me, I pray you will keep reading.

The first thing I’d like to address is the emotions that come with being faced with this revelation of Christmas. Here you are, happy and joyous, loving everything about your favorite time of year – decorating and singing, putting out the nativity set, reminding your kids that it’s not just about the presents, but Jesus is the reason for the season! And here I come, with all my reasons. And you read them because you’re curious and you like me and you want to know what I have to say and where I’m going with all this. And now you maybe wish you hadn’t. Because now you can’t unknown any of this. I suspect there’s shock at never hearing some of this. Bewilderment that what you thought is nothing at all close to the truth. Maybe anger that Christmas has such a deceptive past, not at all related to what you thought. And perhaps you’re even angry at me, a little, deep down, for ruining this for you. Why couldn’t I just keep my thoughts to myself? How about grief and loss? If Christmas is pagan and doesn’t have anything to do with Jesus, now what? (I’m going to address *that* in my next post!). But among all those feelings, what I’d like to talk about today is those of you who are thinking “So what? That’s not how *I* mean it so I don’t see any reason to change what I’m doing.”

And so here’s the hard part I said it would be today. I’m praying for all the right words and I’m asking you to pray that God will speak to your heart. Because this isn’t about me. It’s about HIM.

When this topic comes up, I usually hear one of these statements to justify why it’s still ok to celebrate Christmas:

1. "God knows my heart." Oh, sweet friend, He does! He knows every crevice, every thought, every longing. Do you know what He says about our hearts? “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” (Jeremiah 17:9) In Romans 7:8, Paul said, “For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.” So when I hear, “God knows my heart” about that person’s feelings about Christmas, I remember that there is no goodness in our feelings outside of the change Christ makes in us. We are, by nature selfish, and self-centered. And God truly does know our heart in that (and every) way.

2. "That’s not what I mean when I celebrate Christmas so it shouldn’t matter." Except it’s not about how *we* feel. Deuteronomy 12: 4, 31 says, “Do not inquire about their gods, saying, ‘How did these nations serve their gods?—that I also may do the same.’ You shall not worship the Lord your God in that way, for every abominable thing that the Lord hates they have done for their gods.” God cannot be more plain here – He is saying that He does not want to be honored in the same way that pagan gods are honored. It is not to His glory. Even if *you* are not trying to be pagan in your practices, it IS pagan and God hates it.

3. "God made all days equal." This is true! God is the creator of time and dates and calendars. I see this scripture a lot as an explanation for why Christmas can be celebrated by Christians: “In the same way, some think one day is more holy than another day, while others think every day is alike. You should each be fully convinced that whichever day you choose is acceptable. Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God” (Romans 14:5-6). Paul was addressing those things which were ingrained in the Jews to avoid as law under Moses versus those things that they were free to do through the salvation of Christ (eating meat and esteeming one day over another). He was *not* giving permission to worship God as the pagans do. God sees every day as the same, as His created time. However, He does not see celebrations on a particular day as acceptable for His glory if those celebrations include paganism or witchcraft – especially when done under the guise of HIS NAME.

Another example is Colossians 2:16-17: “Therefore let no one pass judgment on you in questions of food and drink, or with regard to a festival or a new moon or a Sabbath. These are a shadow of the things to come, but the substance belongs to Christ.” All things mentioned here are referring to Messianic Jews who continued to keep the Feasts of the Old Testament, even in their new faith in Christ. Others were mocking them and Paul told them to only be instructed by the body of believers. It is NOT speaking to celebrations outside the realm of scripture.

Many people don’t even realize that the Bible instructs us not to bring a tree into our home for decoration. “Learn not the way of the nations…A tree from the forest is cut down and worked with an axe by the hands of a craftsman. They decorate it with silver and gold; they fasten it with hammer and nails so that it cannot move” (Jeremiah 10: 2-3). It wasn’t the tree itself that was the problem – it’s the fact that this tradition was found in pagan religions. It was a form of worship (as was discussed in the last post). God is saying, “Don’t do what the pagans do and say you're doing it to honor or worship Me.”

Everyone recognizes the commandment “You shall have no other gods before me” (Exodus 20:3). But when it comes to “Christian” holidays, we tend to look the other way. Jesus said in Mark 7:9,13 “You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe your own traditions! Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like that.” In Matthew 15:5, Jesus said, “Why do you break the commandment of God for the sake of your tradition?” How clear Jesus was!  He was blatantly calling out the believers for breaking the commandment of God in order to do their own thing! We cannot justify our own way by going against His way.

If you’ve studied the Bible for a while, you’ve heard this verse many times: "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16). I would like to couple it with this verse from Ephesians: “Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them” (5:11). THIS is my motivation! I want to point you to scripture to expose the lies and deceit that has pervaded our faith so that we may teach and correct and live righteously! We have allowed these things to come into our lives, and we have accepted them without question. It is time to get rid of them and honor God as He says to honor Him!

While I’m not usually overtly confrontational, for the sake of this conversation and for the love I have for you, I am going to openly challenge what I believe is still the most common reaction to all of this information.

There is no doubt or question now that Christmas is a pagan holiday. There is not one thing about it that celebrates Christ. No matter how many memes are made and shared, the truth is that the Son is not who is being honored with this day. It is literally idol worship and against God. Anything against God is by definition anti-Christ. Let that sink in for a moment.

But I can still hear the excuses and the justifications. My friend, that is rebellion.

*Hebrews 10:26 says, “For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins.”

*1 Samuel 15:23 says, “Rebellion is as sinful as witchcraft, and stubbornness as bad as worshiping idols.”

*Isaiah 5:20 “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!”

*2 Tim 4:3 “For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.”

My greatest heartache over this subject is not that Christmas is celebrated among the body of Christ (although that bothers me a great deal). What concerns me so very much is that there are believers WHO KNOW THE PAGAN HISTORY AND DO NOT CARE.

Imagine I am on a trip. I am driving through a state and do not know the speed limit. I get pulled over by a police officer. Although I explain I did not know the speed limit, and therefore, did not know I was speeding, I still am issued a ticket. I am held accountable for my ignorance of information I didn’t have. Now imagine that I am traveling and I see that the speed limit is 55mph, but I want to go 70mph. I get pulled over. The officer asks me if I knew the speed limit. I tell him yes, but I chose to ignore it because it was too slow for me. I get a ticket. *I knowingly and willfully ignored the law in order to do what I wanted.* THAT is what some Christians are doing with Christmas! Knowingly and willfully ignoring God’s Word in order to do what they want. And attempting to justify it!

Do you ever find that people around you aren’t interested in your faith? Do you remember the last time someone was truly interested in hearing how God has changed your life? Why do you think that is? Could it be because we Christians are so busy trying to fit in and look the same as the rest of the world that they already think they’re like us? That is the exact opposite of our calling! We are to be so different that the world wants what we have! *They* are to be drawn to *us,* not the other way around. What would it look like if Christians truly looked different from the rest of the world? Maybe we'd be taken more seriously. “Come out from among unbelievers, and separate yourselves from them, says the LORD” (2 Corinthians 6:17).

If your motivation to celebrate Christmas is truly about celebrating Jesus, you’re at a crossroads. You’ve been presented with Truth – from God’s very word. With every bit of love I know to convey, I hope that I have led you to a moment where you have to say, “It’s not about how *I* feel about it. It's about honoring God, the Father, and the Son, Jesus Christ.” Do not fall into the trap of participating in an anti-Christ holiday!

But how do you DO that? I bet you are still feeling conflicted about the “giving up” of Christmas things: the lights, the joy, the family time. Do not despair! Please, please keep coming back! I have GOOD NEWS! There IS a way to honor the Son and do it in a way that is acceptable to Him. Until that post, know that I tell you these things because I love the Lord and I love you! The intention of my heart is to draw you closer to Him in all this – even though it’s difficult.

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free” (John 8:32).

Reason #7 Why we're done with Christmas

When I posted this on my personal Facebook page, I had very little response.  I wasn't surprised. It's hard to argue with God about what He accepts.

But now we're at the moment to answer the question "What Now?" My last reason possibly left you feeling rather conflicted: wanting to be obedient to the Father, but also grieving giving up the traditions of Christmas. I offer you an alternative.

Hanukkah!

This is considered a minor day on the Jewish calendar. It is not one of the seven holy feasts given to the Israelites through Moses that they were commanded to keep. It is a commemoration of God marked by man (not unlike the stories told about Christmas). And, as if you needed any more surprises, it falls on the 25th day of Kislev (the 9th month) each year! Isn't it ironic that there is already a holiday set aside on the 25th day that *actually* means something to honor God?!

Anyway, how did Hanukkah come to be? In the time of Antiochus IV, the reign over the Jews became very harsh. Outside religions were being forced upon the Jews and their Torah teachings and Temple sacrifices were outlawed. The Temple was desecrated and thousands of Jews were killed because they refused to assimilate into the heathen lifestyle.

A man named Judah Maccabee led a revolutionary army (the Maccabees) against the forces of Antiochus and defeated them. The Temple was regained under Jewish control. However, in the process of cleansing everything and restoring it as the seat of God, it was found that there was not enough lamp oil. God had commanded that a menorah be lit every night, all night in the Temple. There was only enough oil for one night and it took eight nights to make more oil that was pure for the purpose of the Temple. But through a miracle, God multiplied the oil to last the full eight nights to allow the priests time to purify more menorah oil. Hence, the celebration of this miracle of enough oil came to be Hanukkah.

Here are some fun facts:

*Hanukkah is also known as The Feast of Dedication (rededicating the Temple to God) or the Festival of Lights (light of the menorah).

*Jesus was at the Temple during this time of year! John 10:22-23 says, "Then came the Festival of Dedication at Jerusalem. It was winter, and Jesus was in the temple courts walking in Solomon’s Colonnade." Hebrew bibles use the word Hanukkah.

*The Hanukkah menorah has nine branches (the menorahs for the Sabbath have only seven) - one for each of the eight nights and a space for the shammus candle. The shammus is the servant candle, used to light the other candles each night. This servant candle can then be used to light other things around the house if needed, but never one of the branch candles. The servant candle must always provide the light.

*In John 8:12, Jesus said, "I am the LIGHT of the world." And in Matthew 20:28, Jesus said, "just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to SERVE." The Festival of Lights celebrates *the* Light of Jesus Christ, who came as a servant.

*In Matthew 5:14, Jesus said, "*you* are the LIGHT of the world." And Galatians 5:13 says, "through love, SERVE one another." Hanukkah reminds us that, through Christ, we now take His light into our own world to serve in His name!

Other important facts:

*Due to the Jewish calendar being based on the lunar cycle (Roman calendar is based on the solar cycle), each feast can fall at a different time on the Roman calendar each year. This year, Hanukkah begins at sundown on December 24th. Last year it began at sundown on December 6th. In 2013, it began at sundown on November 27th!

*Hanukkah is NOT a Jewish Christmas. It has been mistaken as such because it often falls around the same time of year. As a minor holiday, the emphasis was put upon remembering God's miracle of the oil by the lighting of the menorah and reciting the blessings. As Jews came to America, it grew to involve eight nights of gifts because Jewish children were watching Christmas being played out around them.

*A modern day tradition is to have foods fried in oil during the eight days of Hanukkah. Latkes are very popular as are donuts. The focus is always the miracle of the oil.
Tomorrow I'll share what our Hanukkah looks like. It's evolved over time and it will continue to as I seek and obey God. For now, I want to leave you with this link if you'd like a more in depth look at this minor feast with major symbolism of our Lord Jesus.

What Does Our Hanukkah Look Like?

With all of the information I’ve posted about Christmas, I hope that I’ve also offered you a different perspective in finding an alternative through Hanukkah. But perhaps you’re at a loss as to what that should look like? The beauty of this year is that Hanukkah begins at sunset on December 24th. It literally coincides with Christmas. This creates a very special opportunity to switch gears and convert some of your efforts to a holiday that truly has meaning. It’s not nearly as overwhelming and complicated as it sounds. And if you aren’t quite ready to make the cut to Christmas, if you still need time to pray about it and figure out how to tell your family of your desire to be obedient to God in this area, don’t panic! There’s an entire year to prepare for next Hanukkah!

In the meantime, I thought you might like to know what our home looks like during this Festival of Lights. The biggest difference is that there is no tree. But we do have blue and white lights decorating our front porch outside. There are blue and silver ornaments and ribbon on our hearth. I have two menorahs sitting on my mantle that will be used during the eight nights of Hanukkah once it begins. And tomorrow I will attempt to make my first door wreath with blue and silver ball ornaments. There is no reason why you cannot appropriately decorate your house beautifully during this time!

As I previously explained in another post, gift giving during Hanukkah is a relatively new thing. The traditional gift of Hanukkah has been to give the children gelt – small amounts of money. However, Jewish families moved to American and their children felt left out watching other children receive gifts for Christmas. In preparing for our own Hanukkah this year, I created a list of gifts for each night. Each of these could easily be adjusted to fit your own desire for your family. The only thing I didn’t do was ask my kids for a gift list like I’ve done in previous years. The focus – in addition to the miracle of the oil and God’s gift of Jesus as the Light of the World – is family. I tried to carry that through each of the gifts my family will be getting.

*Night 1 – Something practical (something they may need)

*Night 2 – Something for the family (to enjoy together, like games or a movie)

*Night 3 – Something fun or silly (everyone got a funny glass or mug)

*Night 4 – Something for a stranger (we will be handing out gifts to random people on the street)

*Night 5 – Something for charity (we filled 16 goodie bags for local nursing home residents who have no family and who would otherwise gone without anything to make them feel loved)

*Night 6 – Something small (not necessarily in size, but in concept)

*Night 7 - Something gelt (I bought chocolate covered coins to represent Hanukkah money given to children)

*Night 8 – Something they want (not expensive, and intentionally last)

We will read the story of the Maccabees and discuss the miracle of the oil in the reclaimed Temple. We will discuss how Jesus is the Light and the Servant – lighting each of us to do His will and bring His glory and the good news of His salvation to the rest of the world. We will light the candles each night and recite the blessings.

And we will eat! Foods usually consist of things fried in oil (imagine that!). So we will have Darren’s favorite – my fried chicken. We’ll also make latkes (Jeannie calls them fancy hashbrowns) and chocolate chip challah bread. I found a recipe for brisket, which seems to be popular despite not being cooked in oil. And I’ll have to get donuts sometime during the week. Darren is a picky eater and I’m not sure how Lance will like it, but the girls and I are excited to try some new things.

And that’s about it! Instead of one day, it’s eight. Instead of a tree, we have a menorah. Instead of red and green, we have blue and white. Instead of an imaginary man who is supposed to know everything about you, we have a God who truly knows everything about us – and loves us even when we haven’t been good.

I want to thank each of you who have read every post to the end. I thank you for loving me as a friend and not attacking me even if you don’t agree with me. I thank you for knowing that my heart is for my Lord – and it’s for you – and so you showed me love in return. I thank you for having an open heart and a willing spirit. And who knows? Maybe next year you’ll be lighting your own menorah!

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face sine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn His face toward you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26

My Letter to a Girl

Dear Young Lady,

If I could go back to that season in life when you were questioning everything and searching for answers, I would do a better job of building you up.  I would love you better and encourage you in your talents and gifts.  I would push you to push yourself and be someone.  I would tell you how important you are, how valuable.  I would listen to your heart and understand that sometimes you just needed to vent.  And then be held.

If I could go back to that time in our life, knowing then what I know now, I would have so much more wisdom to share with you.  I like to think I'd be brave enough to say it in such a way that you would listen and take it to heart.  Knowing the mistakes you made and the pain you suffered, I hope that I would be easier on you.

So here's my advice.  It's years late and gathered from many trials and tears.  But it's things I wish I had known or been told.  I offer it now in the hopes that some other girl (or guy) will hear what no one else is telling them and be spared your heartache.

1.  Other people's behavior is a reflection of their character, not yours.  Sometimes it feels like a personal attack when someone treats you poorly.  If it happens enough times, you start to believe you deserve it.  You don't!  Remember that sometimes hurting people hurt people and those that are treating you so badly have probably suffered their own personal tragedy.  Pity them, pray for them, but don't put yourself down because of them.  Someone insulting you is actually them speaking their own deepest fears out loud.

2.  It doesn't matter if a person is a stranger or a family member - if they're toxic to your life, you have the right (and the responsibility to yourself) to limit your contact with them.  It's not your job to fix them.  It's not your job to make their life easier while they continue to hurt you.  It's ok to put your safety first.  And sometimes your safety isn't just physical.  It can be emotional, mental, financial, or spiritual.  I had to put distance between myself and a family member for a few years for my own well being.  Once I made that decision, my life got a lot easier without them constantly in it.

3.  When someone shows you who they are, believe them.  We can all have a bad day (even a bad year).  But people are who they are.  Someone might fool you for a little while, but eventually they can't keep up the act any longer.  The mask falls off and they reveal their true heart.  No amount of excuses (yours or theirs) is going to change them.  No amount of forgiveness is going to change them.  No amount of crying, begging, or threatening is going to change them.  Believe who they are and don't stay.  A pile of poop in a pretty box is still a pile of poop.

4.  Don't ignore the red flags.  Sometimes a person isn't toxic.  Sometimes a person is nice.  But if you find yourself feeling uncomfortable with something they say or do, you need to pay attention to that.  Your instinct is there to guide you and keep you from danger.  Danger might be the guy who can't keep a job.  Danger might be the guy who speaks nicely to you, but screams at the waitress.  Danger might be the guy who tells you something you find inappropriate and uncomfortable.  Don't ignore these things.  He's trying to see what you'll put up with.  What "isn't a big deal" now becomes a big deal later.  Trust me.

5.   Sex changes everything.  Sadly, too many girls think that sex equals love.  And it's the line guys use to convince you they care about you.  But the magnitude that physical intimacy has on your life is nearly indescribable.  There is science that shows the chemical bonds created between two people.  But it's more.  It's emotional attachment.  It's offering a part of yourself that should only ever be offered to one person - the same person - forever.  Because once that emotional connection is made, a girl feels that she's found "the one."  It's a form of imprinting - a false sense of believing that this guy is always going to care for you the way you want him to.  And a guy isn't thinking of love.  He's just thinking of sex.  It's an event.  A moment.  And then it's over.  And you feel used and dirty.  Until the next time he "loves" you and you believe him and he again takes what you freely offer.  And when he walks away (and he will)....you are rejected in every way possible.  He hasn't just walked away from your body; he has left your heart, your mind, your soul.  He has walked away from you because you were not what he wanted forever.  And a young girl's heart doesn't realize that until it's too late.  Sex changes everything.  When you are married, and your husband loves your heart and mind and soul...by the time he loves your body, you will know that he truly loves you for you.  And then you become attached in a healthy emotional/physical relationship.  Then you imprint the way you are supposed to.  And it is beautiful.

6.  "The one" will still be "the one" in 3-5 years.  If a man wants you for you, he'll wait.  He'll wait for sex, yes.  But he'll also wait for you to get to know each other.  He'll wait for you to accomplish goals.  He'll wait for you to be ready to move forward.  If you are supposed to be together, he will do whatever it takes to grow the relationship.  And so will you.  Because it can take years to grow up and know what you want.  I learned the hard way that rushing a relationship out of fear of being alone will only leave you alone.  Don't be afraid to give it time.  The more you know about him (and him about you), the better you'll know if he's truly "the one."

7.  Spend time investing in yourself.  Instead of trying to find the person who "completes" you, focus on what will grow you up.  Get your college degree, have a career, travel, take up a hobby or two, live life with some great girl friends.  All of this will have to move down on the priority list after marriage and children.  So don't be in such a rush to settle down.  Enjoy the world around you.  It will make you more well rounded, much more interesting, and it will broaden your circle of prospective suitors.  I really wish I had known this at your age.

8.  Figure out what you're looking for before you meet someone.  The purpose of dating a guy and getting to know him is to find out if he's marriage potential.  Dating is not hooking up.  It shouldn't even be treated as casual.  You're narrowing down what it is you want and need in a life long partner.  So treat it seriously.  Make a list of what you're looking for.  You can tweak it as you mature, but it should include everything important to you:  how he looks, his height, his personality.  But be sure it also includes things like integrity, his ability to keep a job, he education background, his spending habits, his religion, his family background, etc.  You should have some things you're willing to negotiate (you might prefer he not have tattoos, but if he has one and it's not offensive, it might be ok) as well as things you will not negotiate (drug use for instance).  You will have a hard time determining if a man is right for you if you don't even know what you're looking for.  This list will help you ask important questions that will impact any future life you may have with someone.  It might not matter what kind of car he drives, but it will definitely matter if he never wants kids.  Make a list and make it important to you!


9.  Sometimes, no matter how many times you try, the other person just isn't ready.  Whether it's reconciling that toxic relationship, trying to date the guy you have a crush on, or attempting to apologize to someone who won't acknowledge you, you can't force the results you want.  Sometimes you just have to move on.  In some cases, you might have another chance later.  But don't waste your time doing all the work and getting nowhere.  You deserve better.

10.  Sometimes the things that aren't coming together are because there's something better.  I know it's hard to imagine, but sometimes even something good isn't good enough.  Be open to the idea that the job you weren't offered isn't because you weren't qualified; it's because you're over qualified and they want to offer you a promotion.  And even if that something better doesn't happen instantly, there will always be a time when you'll be able to look back and see where all the pieces were lining up in your favor.  You just didn't know it.  So approach life with optimism.

11.  Sometimes the things that aren't coming together are to spare you from things you can't see.  Just as there are better things around the corner, there are worse things around the corner.  You can't always know what one decision might mean for your life. And just like the better, there will be times when you'll look back and realize that the thing you prayed and begged for turned out to be the thing that you are so thankful to have avoided.  So approach life with gratitude.

12.  Two of the greatest phrases you will ever use in life are "Thank you" and "I'm sorry."  It will never matter how successful or happy or rich you are if you cannot freely speak these two sentences.  You need to always appreciate anything you are ever given, no matter how small.  Every gift - whether it was time or money or possessions - cost someone something.  Say thank you.  And you always need to admit when you are wrong and take accountability.  No one is perfect and many fences are mended by being able to humble yourself and apologize.

13.  Find a way to love yourself.   That number on the scale doesn't define you.  The acne on your face will clear up.  Wishing you could wake up and be anyone but yourself is not only tragic, but it implies that you're a mistake.  You're not!  You are smarter than you realize, able to explain things in ways that help people understand things better.  Your quick wit and sarcasm are a part of your charm.  You encourage people and make them feel better when they are hurting.  Your optimism overrides the negativity around you.  The sooner you find the extraordinary things about you, the sooner you will love the person in the mirror.  She's wonderful.  Knowing that won't make you arrogant.  If anything, it will make you more humble.

14.  Don't just believe in God; have a relationship with Him.  Too many times, people take the faith they had as a child and set it aside in adulthood.  Don't be that person!  You have the foundation so build on it.  Take Jesus with you into every aspect of your life.  Consult Him about your decisions and your future.  Seek Him about your friendships and relationships.  And listen to Him when He answers!  That instinct I mentioned is often the Holy Spirit prompting you to pay attention. So much of the things I learned (and am offering here) could have been avoided if I had just invested more time and practice into my relationship with Jesus.  It's not a Sunday thing.  It's not a weakness thing.  It is security in chaos; guidance in the unknown; peace in the fear; joy in the sorrow; healing in the pain; light in the darkness; love in the loneliness.  It is the single greatest thing in my life and I wish I had committed myself to Him years ago.

15.  Never forget you are loved.  Some days it will be harder to believe than others.  Some days are lonely and you'll feel very unlovable.  But it's a lie.  You have a family that loves you.  You have friends that love you.  You have a Savior who loves you.  And I know I don't say it enough, but I love you too.  Very, very much.  And I'm proud of you.  Every day.

16.  Remember to enjoy where you are.  You'll have some perfect moments in your life, but they won't last.  Life is messy and crazy and stressful.  Don't let that weigh you down.  Enjoy the section of the journey you're on right now.  Remember that while the days are long, the years are short.  One day you'll look back and you won't be the 16 year old girl anymore.  You'll be 41 with a divorce under your belt, a fabulous second marriage, an amazing blended family of seven kids, two awesome grandchildren, and a whole lot of advice you wish you could give to the girl you used to be.  This is the moment you have.  There's no going back and future moments aren't promised.  So make the most of it.  Today.

Forever yours,
Love, Me

Is This Really YOUR Journey???

When being told that "your journey is your own" isn't right...

Recently we had company for a big event in our family's life.  People traveled from several states away to be with us to celebrate.  It's usually an eight hour drive.  Expecting our guests in a couple of hours, I called to see where they were.

Me:  "Are you through Jacksonville yet?"
Them:  "We didn't go through Jacksonville."
"You didn't? So are you at least past Tallahassee?"
"We didn't go through Tallahassee.  We got off the interstate and took a highway."
"Ok, so where are you?"
"Somewhere in Georgia."

I'll save you the rest of the conversation and fill you in on the highlights.  Instead of following GPS, they decided to take a random exit to a highway.  They told me they were 20 minutes from the interstate they needed to be on to get to my house.  When they finally passed a sign that told them the next town, I found it on my GPS and informed them that they were not 20 minutes from the interstate - they were an hour from the interstate.  Instead of being 2 hours from my house, they were FOUR hours from my house. So now an 8 hour drive was going to take them ten.  (In reality, it took them twelve.)

There is a movement among some people to use a particular phrase to encourage others not to worry about the life they are living.  It's packaged in pretty words and lovely backgrounds to be shared and posted and repeated at social events.  It sounds deep and mature so it is believed and trusted and given more value than it deserves.  And while I completely understand the surface platitude that "we each have our own life to live and no life is going to look identical to someone else's," I believe there is great damage being done in allowing this "journey" movement to be so quickly and easily accepted.

Have you ever gone down a one way street...the wrong way?  Every city that has a downtown area is made up of numerous one way streets.  It never fails that I end up turning left when I should have turned right.  Thankfully, I've never caused an accident.  And I've learned that if I'd just set my GPS - and follow it! - that I'd make the right (pun intended) turn every time.  Because GPS is designed to lead you in the right direction. And I know mistakes are possible.  Detours, construction, delayed updates to the system all interfere with navigation systems.  But overall, GPS works like it's supposed to. To add insult to injury, I've even turned the wrong way when I've had a passenger telling me exactly where to go.  Against real and technical advice, I've done my own thing - and failed.

So back to my guests.  They had GPS.  In fact, they had three smart phones between them and three people keeping track of the directions.  We had also given them directions, advising them of the exact exit to take. But one person decided to override our advice and the GPS, saying that they knew better.  The driver listened and you know the rest.  We did not lead them wrong.  GPS never would have led them that way. But they thought they knew where they were going.

I'd like to suggest that many "journeys" that some people are on are not some special path set out just for them by destiny, but are instead roads they found themselves on after failing to listen to those who advised them and getting off the GPS set of directions.
              *Failing out of college
              *Getting fired due to behavior
              *Having an affair
              *Pregnancy out of wedlock
              *Drug/Alcohol addiction
              *Some form of "self discovery"
             
This isn't an exhaustive list, but it's a few things I've watched people I know go through and their loved ones pass it off as "just a part of their journey."  Not only is that untrue, it is harmful!  I can't think of one time in my years as a parent that I have hoped the life my child would lead would include any one of those things on that list.  I can't think of any child who writes an elementary paper about "What I want to be when I grown up" and includes any of those things on that list.  Those things are never in anyone's plans because they're not a part of the intended journey!  They become a part of the journey when specific choices are made.

I know what some of you are thinking because my guests said the same thing:  but going off the beaten path is scenic!  It's less crowded!  There's more adventure!  I agree with all of those things.  My son graduated from The Citadel where the unofficial title of the school is "The Road Less Traveled."  Believe me, I understand the benefits to not following the crowd and looking for adventure.  But I'm talking about using the word "adventure" to describe avoidable chaos.  I'm talking about using a phrase to excuse what should be unacceptable behaviors.  I'm talking about people failing to be accountable for their actions because "it's part of their own special journey."

So what happens when you choose to take a left turn - not because it's a chance to do something good, but because you're breaking the rules and being defiant?  Yes, the road is scenic and exciting and fills you with joy.  There is less traffic and fewer people to hassle you about your choices. But at some point reality is going to hit.
             *There are fewer people to hassle you and tell you what to do, but there are also fewer people to help you.  When you start looking around and the only people with you are the ones who made the same poor choice you did, you start to realize you don't have a good support system.  Had my guests needed help on the empty highway of their choice, they may have found themselves stranded for a while - or with the kind of "help" they'd rather not had.
              *With less traffic, there is a decreased necessity of resources.  Deciding you've made a poor choice and wanting help is great, but if there's nowhere to turn, you're in trouble.  How do you get yourself out of the mess you're in without the right assistance?  My guests had to hope they found a gas station out there in the middle of nowhere before they ran out of gas.  Restaurants, hotels, and mechanics are hard to come by when you go off the beaten path.  These are basic necessities of travel and they chose to put themselves in a situation that took them away from those things.
             *Taking a left and traveling into an area that isn't the best one doesn't just affect you.  It will also affect your passengers (a spouse who cheats, a parent who is fired, a teenager with an addiction - they all affect those within the home).  They didn't ask to take this "journey" with you, but they're stuck on it now.  They have no other choice but to ride it out and hope to get back to civilization.  And what about those on the other side?  Those who are waiting for you, expecting you, watching time pass and not knowing where you are or how you're doing?  They are affected too.  They worry and hope and pray and cry and get angry.  Their lives are affected and some of their plans have to be changed because of your selfishness.  My guests gave no concern over the fact that we expected them to travel and arrive at a particular time.  We had a weekend full of events and they had been invited to join us.  But their flippant decision meant we had to rearrange our schedules to accommodate their delay.  And it never occurred to them the discord they caused us as well.
             *With hard work, a lot of time, and maybe even a u-turn, let's say you finally arrive at your destination.  But with all the added time and energy, you're worn out and exhausted. Some people would say, "as long as you arrived, who cares how you got there?"  Is that how you want to travel life?  Worn out and exhausted from constantly correcting preventable poor choices and mistakes?  With a trail of loneliness and bad memories you could have spared yourself?  Our guests missed out on hours of extra time with us because they wanted to do what they wanted to do.

Every life will suffer heartache and loss, tragedy and pain.  But to bring those things upon yourself - an extra dose of heartache and loss - is an entirely new level of tragedy.  My guests traveled a total of twelve hours for an eight hour trip because they made a mistake.  They didn't take the suggestions set out for them to have the best outcome.  In believing they knew better than those who had gone before them, they put themselves at risk.  And worse, even after realizing their mistake, they continued to travel the road deeper and deeper into the unknown.

We are created to crave adventure and seek out new things.  But the journey we are on is one of discovering our purpose and our Creator.  It is not intended to be a journey of self.  A journey of self will only teach you that we are all the same in our hearts - longing to be different, but failing to be so.  However, a journey of seeking after God will show us that we are special and called to use that specialness with others, for others.  By convincing ourselves that our journey is unique, we take away the uniqueness.  People need to know that they are not alone in this life.  They need to know that they are not the only ones to feel a particular way.  Your struggle is important to share with others because others are struggling too.  And most of the time, the hopes and dreams and goals and advice your loved ones have for you is not for themselves - it is their desire to see you live your best life.  Instead of turning your back on them, trust them!

Don't get caught up in the lie that no one can tell you about your journey.  While there is no one else like you, there is so much that those around you have to offer to enrich your life.  And you have so much to offer them!  Taking yourself down your own "journey" is detrimental to everyone. Lean on each other.  Trust each other.  Recognize that what you do and the choices you make matter far after the decision is made.  Live your life walking the road with each other. It will often lead you to a wonderful destination.

Why the Jewish Calendar Matters...

...to believers

The following information was shared on my private social media site last week.  After the response I
received, I decided to formulate it into a blog post. The intention is to educate and challenge believers to dig deeper into Who God is, what He meant, what He expects, and what we as Christ followers need to do next now that we are accountable for what we know.

In years past, I've always enjoyed Holy Week. It is a week full of history and symbolism, reflecting on  Christ's triumphal entry into Jerusalem, His last supper, His mock trial, His scourging, His crucifixion, His death, and ultimately His resurrection.

But my studies have taught me there's more to the story. The Jewish calendar matters. And this year proves it more than ever.

My sister calls Easter "the Christmas of spring." Baskets, eggs, candy, gifts...either no mention of the cross or additions to the cross. Even churches promote these Easter things and call it outreach. It's as if the stark pain and suffering of Christ's death is too harsh and must be sugar coated (LITERALLY!!). We have been convinced that we must let our children have fun rather than teach them their need of a Savior.

Many don't realize the pagan roots of Easter (and Christmas). Did you know Easter comes from the word Ishtar (Ashtarte)? She is called the Queen of Heaven in the book of Jeremiah and worship of her invoked God's anger. "The children gather wood, the fathers light the fire, and the women knead the dough and make cakes to offer to the Queen of Heaven. They pour out drink offerings to other gods to arouse My anger" (verse 7:18). She was worshiped as the goddess of fertility and reproduction. The symbols of fertility and reproduction??? Eggs! Rabbits!

Why do you suppose the two most poignant moments of creation - the Messiah's birth and death - have been blurred and twisted and mocked by the world? Could it be to divert our attention from the Truth? Could it be to deceive unbelievers? Or could it be to confuse the body of Christ?

This information is specifically for my Christian readers. I want to speak directly to your hearts. I want to remind you that Jesus is still Jewish so the Jewish things matter! We focus so much on Christians being an individual group from everyone else that we forget the first Christians were Jews. The biblical, God centered alternative to Easter is Passover. The feasts of the Lord will be celebrated even in the millennium. The enemy wants our attention off the things that matter and the more believers look like unbelievers in our practices, the more people are led astray.

When we stand before God and He says, "You heard that these things grieved me. You knew that they were things of the world, yet you did them anyway. Why?" Facing God and answering those questions is my burden. That's what started my studying of these things so many years ago. I'm not trying to condemn anyone, but educate. There is a responsibility in the knowing. There's a responsibility in the not knowing also, but once you know...you either decide to make changes or you intentionally decide to be like the world. There's no gray area, no justification of "what I mean by it is this" or "well God knows my heart." It doesn't matter what our intentions are. It matters what God thinks and says about the topic. And He wants us to know what He thinks and says about this topic!!!

In the midst of all this discussion about Easter, I wanted to tell you about the wonderful Jewish holiday of Purim. It has baskets and gifts and food; there's charity to the needy and neighborly love. There are even costumes! Purim, the celebration of the story of a real queen, a true queen - Queen Esther.  This year Purim was three days before Easter.  Her are links for more information.
http://m.chabad.org/…/aid/1362/jewish/Purim-How-To-Guide.htm
http://m.wikihow.com/Celebrate-Purim

All last week, I presented the information above about Easter, its origins, and its false ties to Christianity. But there's one final piece of information I want to offer you that I think will blow your mind.

My opening comments said that the Jewish calendar matters and this year proves it more than ever. So I'd like you to look at your calendar. Find a real hard copy, not your phone. On March 25th it should say Good Friday. This day is traditionally accepted as the date of the crucifixion of Christ. Then Sunday, March 27th will say Easter, which is traditionally accepted as the resurrection of Christ. Now turn your calendar to April 23rd. If your calendar is like mine, it says Passover. Biblically this is the date that the angel of death passed over the Jewish homes and the death of every first born occurred in Egypt. It is also biblically the day that Jesus was crucified. The first Passover was a foreshadowing of the second Passover (but that's another post). 

On the Jewish calendar, Passover is always the same date: Nisan 14. The day of the week can vary, but the date is the same. So why is this important?

Are you ready?

Because you can't have the Resurrection one month before the death happens.

Now do you see the problem with celebrating Easter as the resurrection? Besides being rooted in a pagan fertility goddess, the day doesn't align with the timetable of events!

I hold sacred the remembrance of Christ's sacrifice on the cross. I hold dear the price He paid for my sins. I carry the promise of hope in His resurrection. But I do it at the time it actually happened. Jewish tradition does not hold a person's birthday as important. At birth, a baby has accomplished nothing. What the Jewish culture does regard as important is the day a person dies. At that point, there is a life to look back on. This is why there is no exact date of Christ's birth. Outside of being the Messiah, as a Jewish child, His birth was not remarkable. It was His death - and resurrection - that was noteworthy. It is why we know that He died on April 3, 33AD, on the feast of Passover.  We also know He was resurrection on April 5, 33AD, which is Nisan 16, The Feast of Firstfruits.  (But that's for another post as well.)

I'll be celebrating the Savior's life, death, and resurrection in a few weeks. Now that you know, I hope you'll join me in celebrating the Savior appropriately.

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